GELFAND: Gonzaga Didn't Get Jobbed by the Officials

Pop quiz: A lot of fouls were called in the Gonzaga-North Carolina game because:

  1. There were a lot of fouls; or
  2. The perfidious officials were out to ruin the damned game and deprive Gonzaga of its rightful title.

If you answered “B,” you probably believe that Pizzagate was a thing and that flu shots cause autism. But don’t worry; a lot of people are into fatuous myths. In fact, if Twitter, ESPN, Yahoo and the daily Spokesman-Review are any indication, you’re actually in the majority. Which, by the way, is nothing to be proud of. And yet…

In an era in which all truth is either irrelevant or highly inconvenient, folks we used to call “journalists” cannot wait to pander to — and here I channel the hateful but incisive H. L. Mencken — Boobus Americanus.

So, yeah, the officials kept blowing their whistles because the players kept fouling. In fact, while the headlines and tweets were kicking up a storm — generally along the lines that “the game had no flow,” or “Fer Godssake letum play!” — nothing at all unusual was unfolding.

Naturally, the Spokesman-Review of Spokane did not see it that way. “What was expected to be an up-and-down shootout,” the newspaper’s columnist opined, “instead became a lurch-and-stagger slog, undone by…the referees’ unfortunate hijacking of the action.”

When Gonzaga ground out a 96-38 victory over West Coast Conference rival San Diego, the Bulldogs committed 12 fouls

Yes, the grapes are sour all across Gonzaga Nation, but it’s time to move on. Let us turn to the numbers. First, in case you are among the majority who want to believe that the precious Zags got hosed, both teams were called for 22 fouls in the championship game. During the regular season, Gonzaga averaged just 16.9 fouls, but there’s a reason for that; the Bulldogs, as no one calls them, were playing opponents just a rung up the ladder from the Shriner’s auxiliary ladies, better known (fun fact) as the Grand Council of the Ladies Oriental Shrine of North America.

When, for example, Gonzaga ground out a 96-38 victory over West Coast Conference rival San Diego, the Bulldogs committed 12 fouls. Now, they basically got a bye into the championship game, but in their four final games of the tournament, they were whistled — yes — 22 times. Of course, no one (ironically) called foul in the first three of those games, because Gonzaga won them. It was just the 22 fouls versus North Carolina that were so unfair.

I don’t know why most people aren’t content to just make a friendly wager and then root for their money. But no — spectators typically want to confer purity, decency and the American Way in teams that represent nothing more than a zeal for victory at all cost. So Gonzaga became the flavor of the month, the March Munchkins who represented a tiny school from an unglamorous town — the lovable underdog taking on the mighty and undoubtedly corrupt Tar Heels. Maybe North Carolina isn’t a dynasty, but there’s a legacy, and it includes winning and cheating, an unbeatable combination not unknown even on our frozen tundra. The current roster seems free of academic atrocities, but the smell of corruption still mixes with the scent of freshly bloomed daffodils in Chapel Hill.

The corruption, involving fake classes, went on for something like two decades. By all accounts, no current athletes were implicated, but as many as 3,000 “students” might have received credits for the bogus classes. By the time the NCAA throws down the hammer, even the equestrian club might wind up on probation.

Still, I have trouble with the whole “Heroes versus Villains” thing. Call me cynical, but here’s the thing: the Zags weren’t even underdogs. The game was basically a pick. In my lexicon, to qualify as David you have to be getting at least eight. Anyway, Gonzaga’s best players included a 7-footer (Zach Collins) who projects as a top-10 NBA draft prospect and three transfer students who spent a total of 94 minutes on the court versus Carolina. If you think Collins is returning disguised as a sophomore, consider this: he’s from Las Vegas. Case closed. Maybe you’re thinking that the guys who transferred were lured by the prospect of fishing the polluted Spokane River. To which I say, wake up and smell the point spread. It’s about winning, which is fine. But leave your sanctimony at the classroom door.

Anyway, in the end, the only evidence of victimization that the Gonzaga partisans could dredge up was that North Carolina’s Kennedy Meeks had a hand out of bounds when the refs (mistakenly) called a tie-up late in the game. Seriously? I yield to no one in my contempt for authority. Hell, as a Little League coach, I once got kicked out of a game for pointing out an umpire’s stupidity. (The idiot blew the infield fly rule. Unbelievable.) But basketball is not susceptible to perfect officiating. The refs were much better than average; various replays showed five or six missed calls that might have made a difference, but the calls were going both ways.

Yes, Gonzaga fans are probably still kvetching because the lovable but dangerously clumsy Przemek Karnowski — the Polish Trifle — got called for a Flagrant-1 foul.  The 300-pound, 7-foot-1 behemoth just happened to break a fall by giving Carolina star Joel Berry II a little reach-around that mutated into a choke, at which point Karnowski continued his journey by butt-bashing Berry’s head and then, for good measure, falling on top of the poor dude. Karnowski’s fateful fall from grace was, without doubt, innocent. Karnowski — or perhaps I should say Karnowski’s ass — was called for a couple of other fouls in the course of the game. He then apologized to Berry, who assured him that they were good.

Gonzaga fans were and are less accepting, insisting that because the foul was unintentional, it could hardly be flagrant. The fact that the rule book says otherwise will not deter them.

I can understand their intransigence. It’s hard to accept defeat when you are convinced that God, or karma, or purity of purpose is on your side. My message to Gonzaga fans is simple: I covered the spread and you didn’t.

Mike’s cantankerous insights can be heard each Monday on Bob Sansevere’s podcast.

The Stage is Set: Lynx Host Chicago Sky to Begin WNBA Playoffs
By Mitchell Hansen - Sep 25, 2021
Underappreciated and Underrated, Sylvia Fowles is Rising Above it All in Historic Year
By Mitchell Hansen - Aug 27, 2021
Wild

Don't Freak Out If Kaprizov Cools Off At Some Point

It’s no secret that first-year Minnesota Wild star Kirill Kaprizov has made a good first impression on fans of the team and the NHL at large. The […]

Continue Reading