Malik Beasley Has the Most Team-Friendly Contract in the NBA
By Dylan Carlson - Feb 20, 2021
Even at the time of the signing, I had a hunch that Malik Beasley might be underpaid, but you wouldn’t have known that based on the coverage […]
KATman Returns
By Dylan Carlson - Feb 11, 2021
Our beloved Karl-Anthony Towns has returned! What a night for Minnesota Timberwolves fans. Sure, it felt like your average Wolves choke job after they relinquished a six-point […]
The Timberwolves of Wall Street
By Dylan Carlson - Feb 4, 2021
Today I, Dylan Belfort, come to you with the worst stonk advice you will ever read. For each Minnesota Timberwolves players’ corporation, I will tell you whether […]
Can Malik Beasley Be the NBA’s Most Improved Player?
By Dylan Carlson - Jan 29, 2021
Malik Beasley made it public this week that his goal is to be the NBA Most Improved Player this year, so I decided to do a conclusive […]
7 Beefs With the Coaching Against Orlando
By Dylan Carlson - Jan 21, 2021
After Cole Anthony ripped out our hearts in the most predictable way, the loss last night versus the Orlando Magic became the biggest standout since the gut-wrencher […]
Let’s Play the Blame Game
By Dylan Carlson - Jan 14, 2021
The Minnesota Timberwolves looked the best they’ve looked in two years for three quarters last night against The Memphis Grizzlies! Then the fourth quarter happened. The Wolves […]
Okay, Now It’s Time to Panic
By Dylan Carlson - Jan 8, 2021
Nothing replaces Karl-Anthony Towns. The Minnesota Timberwolves have been competitive for a combined nine quarters during this six-game losing streak. Without Karl, this is possibly not even […]
Don’t Panic About the Wolves Getting Swept in L.A.
By Dylan Carlson - Dec 30, 2020
When I make my girlfriend mad or sad, she makes me say three nice things to her. Since these Minnesota Timberwolves have made us all so mad […]
3 Truths and a Lie From the Wolves 111-101 Win Over Detroit
By Dylan Carlson - Dec 24, 2020
Today I’ve been given the task of Thursday morning quarterbacking the home opener. As Vegas expected (our Kyle Ratke had Wolves -5.5 last night) and as Chelanga […]
Waiving Hollis-Jefferson Shows the Wolves Aren’t Ready For Positionless Basketball
By Dylan Carlson - Dec 22, 2020
So they did the most predictable thing. Once again, the Minnesota Timberwolves broke my heart. They cut the king for which I chose to simp on this […]
Who Gets the Minutes? Projecting the Timberwolves’ 2020-21 Rotation
By Dylan Carlson - Dec 17, 2020
After two dismal performances, Minnesota Timberwolves fans have been left in a state of anxiety trying to decide if Jake Layman can be the starting power forward […]
Josh Okogie Should Not Be Playing Power Forward
By Dylan Carlson - Dec 10, 2020
Each year before the season, the media covering the Minnesota Timberwolves pushes something that will never happen. Last year, it was Andrew Wiggins ruining the point — […]