July is one of my favorite months of the whole year. The first week starts with a bang with the Fourth of July, which is immediately followed by National Bikini Day on July 5, and the day after that is National Fried Chicken Day. There’s nothing more American than that.
Well, except for one thing, watching two people beat the stuffing out of each other. Americans love beating each other up so much that there’s not just one sport but a whole sub-category of sports dedicated to people getting their asses kicked in every conceivable way.
Boxing has a rich history, from Joe Louis to Muhammad Ali to Mike Tyson to present-day stars like Floyd Mayweather. The sport has evolved over the past century, and celebrity boxing matches are the newest incarnation. Some traditionalists say it is ruining the sport. Back in the day, the only way you could watch two famous people duke it out was by watching MTV’s Celebrity Deathmatch. But now more than ever, it seems like notable figures are eager to jump in the ring in exchange for lots of money and publicity.
Recently it was announced that legendary Minnesota Vikings running back Adrian Peterson will duke it out with ex-Pittsburgh Steelers RB Le’Veon Bell on July 30 in Los Angeles. As a connoisseur of celebrity boxing, my reaction to this news was pure excitement. My wealth of experience watching celebrity boxing matches at dive bars should greatly inform my prediction of which future Hall of Famer will win in a fight.
Let’s start with Adrian Peterson. His rare combination of strength and acceleration made him virtually unstoppable in his prime. He’s so strong that there are urban legends about his crushing handshake. Peterson quickly built his reputation as the one player absolutely no one wanted to tackle; he would plow right through guys.
If there’s one play that best illustrates Adrian Peterson’s ferocity, this would be it.
Imagine if you were an NFL player and heard Peterson yell a war cry after demoralizing a linebacker like that. I would just pull a Vontae Davis and retire at halftime. I believe Adrian Peterson is one of those guys with that dawg in them, and I expect his strength to carry over to the boxing ring. If I had to compare Peterson to a modern-day boxer, it would be Deontay Wilder. Both are known for their brute force and knockout ability, so to speak. Headbutting William Gay is a perfect example of what Peterson could do to Bell in the ring.
Le’Veon Bell is a different kind of player. In the gridiron, Bell was known to be a patient, elusive runner with some pass-catching talent. He had an elite ability to process plays post-snap. While he wasn’t the most powerful runner between the tackles, he certainly had enough strength to get those tough yards.
This video briefly details Bell’s ability to read defenses post-snap and showcases his penchant for making something out of nothing:
Floyd Mayweather is my boxing comp for Bell. Like Mayweather, he isn’t going to be super aggressive out of the gate. He’ll take his time and wait for the optimal moment to strike when his opponent is gassed. Mayweather is arguably the best boxer of his generation, of course. So while I don’t think Bell’s football career is comparable to Mayweather’s boxing career, I think they take a similar approach to their game.
So who do I think has the upper hand? Peterson is pound-for-pound the stronger fighter. However, I think Bell’s skillset transfers a bit better to boxing. His ability to evade, elite play recognition, and deceptiveness match up well against Peterson, who is more reliant on sheer physicality. As it stands, Vegas has Bell at -180 to win the fight, while Peterson sits at +180. In layman’s terms, Bell is favored.
If Le’Veon Bell plays his cards right and doesn’t get cocky, I think he wins the fight. Then again, Adrian Peterson proved to the world not to count him out back in 2012 after tearing his ACL. Nearly a decade later, history could repeat itself, with Peterson proving the doubters wrong one more time.
